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| Art by me |
Old Grumpy is a catfish. A really big catfish of near-cryptid reputation. Nobody knows how he got in that pond at the edge of town (or a well, or a luxury pool, or the sewers, or a latrine for all I care). Nobody knows how long he has been there. Nobody, except for perhaps a few of the old folks, have even really seen him. But everyone in town agrees that he is there, and, as far as generational memory is concerned, he has always been there.
Like the Sun rising in the East and the ground beneath your feet: Old Grumpy is an inevitable certainty.
Make sure you have some rumors ready for Old Grumpy. You can make a table for them, or put them on a pre-existing rumor table from the town you are placing him in. I personally did the latter (a potter in town believes her father's most precious sculpture is hidden in the murk of Old Grumpy's Pond).
He is big and fat (details on this are up to you, I personally went with 15 ft.), and he is rich as a sultan. Lots of baubles have been lost in the murk. Lots of coins have been tossed into the water for wishes. Artists have flung their precious creations into the pond in fits of rage, and secretive sorcerers have submerged cursed items and potions in the muddy depths, in hopes that nobody would find them.
But somebody did. Old Grumpy. He added it to his stash, in his murky cave (or maybe he just ate them).
To replicate this stash, find some random tables. Even better, create a random table that tells you what random table to roll on. Something along the lines of:
[1d20, roll 1d12 times]
1: Old Grumpy's Cave leads to a Dungeon (if you get this result more than once, reroll)
2-5: Result x100 GP.
6: Some old, waterlogged (yet legendary) piece of furniture (find a random table for this)
7: A potion.
8: A scroll (somehow preserved)
9-10: A silvered weapon (covered in moss, but never rust).
11: A corpse (roll for loot/what it's carrying)
12: Roll a work of art.
13: A Plot Hook!
14: Roll random starting equipment from the Knave! character creation guide.
15: The skull of a never-before-seen cryptid.
16: A deed in a bottle.
17: A Gem (Roll on the Tome of Adventure Design's Gem Table).
18: A Giant Catfish Egg
19: A Magical Trinket.
20: Roll 5 More Times.
Keep in mind, some of these items may be in Old Grumpy's stomach.
As far as mechanics are concerned, do whatever you want with him. B/X seems to place giant catfish at HD 8 + 3 (39 HP according to Old-School Essentials). 5e has no official rules for a Giant Catfish, as far as I have found, but I did find a homebrew one (keep in kind, its whiskers are not dangerous, but Old Grumpy's certainly should be). This electric giant catfish is from the Tome of Horrors Complete, and you can use it in 3.5 or Pathfinder.
Furthermore, there should be some rules in place for finding Old Grumpy. Keep in mind, he prefers to go out at night, and (at least in my town), he seems to enjoy the water in the Summer and Winter the most, less so in the transitional seasons.
Mine look a little like this:
[%sighting Old Grumpy's shadow in Dawn (DN), Day (D), Twilight (T), and Night (N)]
Spring: DN0% D0% T0% N6%
Summer: DN2% D1% T4% N5%
Fall: DN1% D0% T2% N3%
Winter: DN3% D2% T3% N4%
They don't make too much sense, not to us at least. That is intentional. I want them to replicate Old Grumpy's genius, abyssal mind.
Next: Fishing. I took some inspiration from Pokémon's GBA fishing system here. If players are trying to fish for Old Grumpy, use the following rules:
[%Catching Big Grumpy each turn (10 minutes) is spent fishing]
Using Regular Bait (stale bread, worms, lures): %sighting x 0.5
Using a Magic Item: %sighting x 2
Using a Work of Art: %sighting x 1-10 (depending on how beautiful it is)
Using a Tied Up Person: %sighting x 5
Playing a sad song increases the probability by +2%
Playing a forgotten and depressing sea shanty from decades ago increases the probability to 100%
So, for example, if the fisherman is trying to catch old grumpy by using a worm at night in the winter, he has a 2% chance each turn of having Old Grumpy bite. If his friend is playing a sad song on a lute, then the probability becomes 4%. If they are playing the forgotten sea shanty (you can put the sheet music for this song in a dungeon, or in the tavern, or wherever), then there is a 100% chance of Old Grumpy biting.
Once Old Grumpy bites, this is what you do (taking inspiration from Veins of the Earth's climbing system):
Roll a D20. Compare it to all of the fisherman's stats (you are trying to roll lower). Do this in descending order, from Constitution to Charisma. For the Strength/Wisdom and Dexterity/Intelligence, use whichever is highest.
Fail Constitution: All subsequent fails are cumulative (meaning that if this roll succeeds, then ignore any other failed rolls after the first failure).
Fail Strength/Wisdom: Fisherman is dragged into water. Possibly in danger (see Charisma fail).
Fail Dexterity/Intelligence: Old Grumpy makes away with the bait. He either eats it, or adds it to his stash (50/50).
Fail Charisma: If the fisherman failed the Strength/Wisdom roll, then Old Grumpy will try to eat him. If not, Old Grumpy will simply disappear and not make himself seen for another 1d6 days.
And there you have it. A small example of a legendary fish to put in any village or town you create, as well as a set of rudimentary rules for fishing in a Fantasy TTRPG. Hope you enjoyed! Happy travels.
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